I guess I’m in a state of melancholy. Pensive thought. I’m not wishing away for the future to come, I’m not looking back on the past that was… I’m just here. Waiting.
As I wait it seems my dreams could be coming true right before my eyes. I don’t feel like I deserve any dreams coming true. And I’m afraid to believe in them because they may just be for a passing moment, not mine to keep. It’s the same approach I have to love – I’m working on believing in love, and dreams I’ll work on next.
I’m ready for the next chapter of my life story to begin. I have so much I’m happy for and I want to start building again. I guess I’ve passed some kind of unknowing pensiveness of the thought that stepping forward means leaving behind. I can step forward and I can bring my life, my love, my dreams with me. I am not two seperate entities. One with a life that ended a year ago, and the other that kept living. All my life experiences, they make up me, and make me the person I love.
I’m coming to much more,